MY LAND

idgaf-vibes:

….maybe i do but bitches ain’t gotta know that.

mihimaru:

a healthy relationship with a significant other in which we both love and support each other and genuinely enjoy being in each others company

awakeningavalon:

babyinthegutter:

every time my mood drops, it’s like i can hear everyone around me sigh a silent exasperated sigh of, “not again”

i promise that i am just as sick and tired of it as you are

This is the realest shit I ever read.

1hat3u:

hopeless romantic with trust issues and a sex drive out the roof

kushandwizdom:

chillona:

pensaynoire:

buttcheekpalmkang:

tummytrubs:

buttcheekpalmkang:

chillona:

morenabuena:

chillona:

scarzig:

chillona:

lol in therapy today I was talking about how I got spanked as a child, but there were a handful of times I actually got *beat*. And so I was talking about getting the belt and my therapist was like “Oh and these were the beatings, then?” And I was like “Oh no! those were the spankings. I got spanked with a belt. The beatings were way more physical”.

And when I tell you he looked terrified, because I had learn those things to be “normal” and “okay”??? I realized then and there that “Oh shit, that actually wasn’t okay”.

It’s not a spanking if they use a belt? 😧

lol I think a spanking is ‘supposed’ to just mean a hand. We’ve just been conditioned to think a belt or other objects are the norm and okay 🙃

It is okay. We got beat with the belt and even coat hangers. Stop making a big deal out of it

But nobody asked you???

Everybody doesn’t react the same. Just because some people came out of childhood mentally okay with getting whooped with whatever object was nearby doesn’t mean everyone was/will be.

Even if you emerged okay from being beaten as a child that doesn’t make it okay. Beating kids for their mistakes is not okay but a lot of POC grow up thinking culturally that it’s okay. It’s really not.

A lot of adults forget they’re grown ass people and hit their kids like they’re not children. A light tap to us might feel like a haymaker to them.

I struggle so much with no perpetuating this mess with my boys. There is no reason a grown ass person needs to be smacking on a kid. What the hell does it even teach a kid? No one else is allowed to replicate the punishment, right? So the only time they can expect to be assaulted for mistakes is in their home? That’s a great idea

RIGHT?!?! Like I work at a preschool. And 4 year olds are a handful but what the fuck we ALL manage to properly assess the situation and not abuse them. So why the fuck is it okay to have it done at home???

Do you know how embarrassed I was to talk to my therapist in detail about what my mom did to me??? And up til that point I shrugged it off because I thought it was all okay??

So thank you for learning and unlearning this conditioning. I’m sure your boys are wonderful and I’m glad they won’t have to be put through this.

Wow